Whether you’re attending casual backyard nuptials or a black tie ballroom affair, these dos and don’ts for wedding guests will save you from making a fool out of yourself! There are two types of wedding guests: the good and the “Who invited that person?” Which one would you rather be? Save these tips for yourself or pass them along to family and friends who will be celebrating your big day with you. Either way, heed our advice on how to be a good wedding guest!
Don’t get obnoxiously drunk.
Indulge a bit. Have a good time. Act a little goofy. It is a celebration after all! But stop just before indulging too much. Trust us.
Do attend the ceremony.
Unless you get a flat tire on the way there or have some other crazy extenuating circumstance, there is no excuse for only showing up for the reception. It’s tacky and makes it look like you’re only there for the free booze and food.
Do let the photographers do their job.
This is a professional photographer’s pet peeve. You might have your own fancy camera or even just the latest iPhone, and you might think you want lots and lots of pictures of all the important moments. But don’t get in the way of the professionals. They were paid big bucks to be there; you’re there to celebrate and enjoy yourself. We are sure the couple will be more than happy to share photos with you later.
Do respect wishes for an unplugged ceremony.
The unplugged ceremony trend started a few years ago and it’s one we hope never goes out of style. If you see a sign or hear an announcement that the couple wants you to keep your phones down during their vows, please respect their wishes. Unfortunately, requests for an unplugged ceremony often go ignored and it always makes us sad for the couple and the ceremony photos.
Do purchase a gift from the registry or give cash or gift cards.
This is tricky and we are sure a lot of readers won’t agree with our opinion. Yes, technically, it is the thought that counts and the couple should be grateful that you were kind enough to even give them a gift. But we’re willing to bet that they would much rather have the coffee pot they registered for over you going rogue and purchasing something that you “just know they’ll love.” The couple took the time to create registries of items they really need or want. Unless you really – and we mean really really – know a couple’s taste, don’t purchase something that isn’t on one of those lists. If you don’t heed our advice, at least provide them with a gift receipt.
Do RSVP and do it on time.
With a pre-addressed, stamped envelope (or sometimes even just a link to a website!), engaged couples literally couldn’t make it easier for guests to RSVP to their wedding. Yet inevitably the couple has to track down guests after the RSVP date to ask if they’ll be coming to their wedding. Do your friends or family a favor and not only RSVP but do it by the requested date to allow for proper, timely planning. Don’t just assume the couple knows that you are coming. Yes, we’re talking to you, wedding party members!
Bonus Tip: If you have to cancel last minute, do let someone (the couple, parent of a soonlywed, wedding planner, someone, ANYONE!) know.
Don’t ask to bring a guest if one wasn’t included on your invitation.
And don’t just bring someone along anyways. Whether it’s budget, venue capacity, a desire for an intimate wedding, or something else, there is a reason why “and guest” wasn’t included on your invitation. Asking to bring a date along (or worse yet, not asking and just showing up with a plus one) costs the couple money, messes with seating arrangements, and is a tad bit disrespectful. Just don’t.
Don’t wear white.
Unless specifically instructed by the couple, like in a case of a themed wedding, wearing white to a wedding is still a major fashion faux pas. You also want to dress for the occasion. If the wedding’s dress code is unclear, do a little research on the venue. This should give you a good idea of the wedding’s aesthetic and what type of events are typically held there.
If there are favors, take only one.
Don’t be greedy and fill your hands, arms, and pockets. Most of the time, favors are meant to be one per person or one per couple. Follow similar advice at the cookie table. If there are bags or boxes that you can fill up to take home, go for it! There is nothing better than a cookie breakfast the morning after a wedding. But make sure you don’t take more than your fair share and that you’ve left some for others to enjoy.
