This month’s question is one I think most Burgh Brides (and just brides in general) struggle with.
Bride M writes…
“What is the etiquette when inviting out-of-town people who you know definitely can’t make it to your wedding shower? I don’t want them to think I am fishing for a gift, but I also don’t want another family member to mention my shower and for them to wonder why they didn’t hear about it. I know if the situation was flipped, I wouldn’t mind receiving an invitation or buying a gift for someone. Everyone I ask says something different… please help!”
Yes, this is definitely an issue that all brides have trouble with! And I totally get it. On one hand, you don’t want those who live far away to feel left out. But on the other, you don’t want to appear as if you are just inviting them (despite knowing that the is no way they could attend) in order to get a present. But I think perhaps brides worry about this a bit more than the out-of-town guests do. Like you said, if the situation was reserved, you wouldn’t feel like you were just being hit up for a gift! So it’s quite possible that you’re non-local guests wouldn’t feel that way either.
Personally, I think it’s nice to include everyone. You can always include a hand-written note with your invitation saying that you know they won’t be able to attend but that you’ll be thinking of them that day and wishing they were there. It shows that they are important to you and that you want them to feel included, even if they physically can’t be. I don’t think your closest friends and family members would view an invitation from you as a ploy to get something from your registry. But if they choose to send a gift, great! If not, that’s great too! Because it’s not about presents, it’s about people, right? Right!
Readers, what do you think? How did you handle out-of-town guests when it came to your bridal shower? Comment below and help a fellow Burgh Bride out!
Planning a wedding and need some help? You’ve come to the right place! Submit your question and you could see it answered right here on the blog.